Social skills

Social skills are a group of skills which a social animal uses to interact and communicate with others. These skills can be used to affect status in the social structure and for many other motivations. Social rules and relations are created, communicated, and changed in verbal and nonverbal ways creating social complexity useful in identifying outsiders and selecting eligible mates. The process of learning these skills is called socialization.

Examples

 * Verbal communication
 * Small talk or conversation
 * Sharing jokes
 * Sharing and discussing of ideas (politics, religion, sports, music, technology, internet, current events, fashion, and movies are all common topics.)
 * Teaching or learning
 * Nonverbal communication
 * Active listening
 * Body language
 * Both verbal and nonverbal
 * Conflict resolution
 * Intercultural relations

In Behavior Therapy
In behavior therapy social skills are learned behavior that allow people to achieve social reinforcement and to avoid social punishment According to Schneider & Bryne (1985), who conducted a meta-analysis of social skills training procedures (51 studies)- operant conditioning procedures for training social skills had the largest effect size, followed by modeling, coaching, and social cognitive techniques in that order

Properties of polished social skills

 * Basic
 * Verbal
 * Smoothness of delivery (lacks stuttering, awkward pauses, etc.)
 * Intelligible speech (not too loud or soft, not dropping off the end of sentences)
 * Uses muscle words to help describe ideas in conversation (words designed to "grab" the attention of the listener)
 * Variable tone (avoidance of a monotonous tone)
 * Asks open-ended questions
 * Non-verbal
 * Active listening
 * Confident stance (standing up straight but not at attention)
 * Relaxed manner (not too tense, not falling asleep)
 * Body language in sync with the verbal message
 * Leans forward while talking
 * Open stance (not close hands)
 * Touching conversation partner (only in appropriate situations, as this can be misinterpreted)
 * Smile (but not overdoing)
 * Remembers and uses names during conversation


 * Complex
 * Skilled in diplomacy (how one handles disagreements)
 * Ability to feign interest
 * Expressing empathy in thought by giving accurate and kind feedback to show you understand.
 * Expressing feeling empathy by sharing the names of the feelings the speaker might be experiencing such as frustration, anger, hurt or love.

Social ineptitude
Social ineptitude is a lack of social skills. A person who is considered to lack social skills is said to be socially inept. However, the use of the term social ineptitude is considered derogatory by many. People who have pervasive developmental disorders such as autism and Asperger syndrome may have impaired social interaction, and are often described as socially inept. Many people with mental disorders (such as Schizophrenia) also tend to be socially inept. A belief in one's own social ineptitude, either real or imagined, is one of the diagnostic criteria for avoidant personality disorder. Additionally, the criteria for social ineptitude varies from culture to culture. A simile for social ineptness is shyness, though a shy person can be aware and adhere to social conventions, just as those who are bold can often be socially incompetent.

Social ineptitude may also be simply a part of a person's character. Some believe that social ineptitude should be accommodated, not exterminated.

External links and references
Jon D. Williams Cotillions, teaching young people social skills for over 58 years]
 * Some Facts Psychologists Know About… SOCIAL SKILLS
 * Teaching Social Skills
 * Encouraging Social Skills in Young Children
 * Information on Social Skills for Male College Students
 * National Association of School Psychologists on Social Skills
 * Stategies for teaching social skills to children
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Habilitats socials Soziale Kompetenz Habilidades sociales Softskills 社会技能 Социјалне вештине