Psychological defense mechanism

 Defense mechanism  Behavior patterns primarily concerned with protecting ego. Presumably the process is unconscious and the aim is to fool oneself. It is intra psychic processes serving to provide relief from emotional conflict and anxiety. Conscious efforts are frequently made for the same reasons, but true defense mechanisms are unconscious.

Repression/suppression
One way to deal with emotional pain is to not think about what has happened. We put it out of our mind and we forget it. With practice, this becomes an automatic process, we really don't remember what we did or what happened. This is repression.

Displacement
Displacement is simply taking an emotion that belongs in one situation and displaying it in another. The commonest emotions which are displaced are: Anger and hostility.

Example of Displacement: Imagine, for a moment, that you have had a rough day at work. Your boss has chewed you out, and you are angry about it. It's not safe to take out your anger on your boss. You might be fired. So, when you get home, you yell at the kids and have a fight with your wife.

That's displacement.

Projection
Projection is the process of taking feelings we have about ourselves (usually painful feelings) and focusing them on other people.

Examples of Projection: A person who fears he is drinking too much may point out another person who is drinking and put him down for being a drunk. A man or woman who has been cheating on his/her spouse may accuse the spouse of being unfaithful.

Blame is a form of projection. Examples of blame: An individual, concerned about his drinking, may blame his parents for the way they raised him, or his wife for the way she treats him. Eventually the alcoholic comes to hate himself, but he finds this emotional state too much to bear so he expresses this as hatred for those closest to him, usually his wife and children.

Denial
Denial is the refusal to believe or accept the reality that certain events have happened (are happening) or will happen. To accept the reality would bring emotional pain, so the events are denied. This is the single most common psychological symptom of chemical dependency.

Related to denial is the defense called minimizing. In Minimizing, events are accepted, but only in a watered down version. Example: Sure I drink once in a while. Everybody does. It's no big deal. Once in a while I might get carried away, but it really isn't a problem.

Withdrawal
Withdrawal is usually used when a person is afraid of rejection or afraid to fail. By withdrawing the person is attempting to avoid psychological pain. The problem is it inevitably leads to strong feelings of loneliness, and it does nothing for the original fears.

Withdrawal takes several forms. Commonest are: Silence, Running away, and the use of drugs and excessive sleeping.

Closely related to withdrawal are: Avoidance and Deflection.

Many co-alcoholics use avoidance extensively. i.e., they won't talk about the problems at home and they stay away from others to avoid feelings of embarrassment, shame, etc.

Deflection:
Deflection is a method of changing a subject that is or might be painful. Commonest methods of deflection are: Humor and Anger. These are the two commonest methods of deflecting people away from difficult subjects.

Alcoholics frequently combine deflection and projection through the use of anger and hostility.

Rationalization
Rationalization is to justify your behavior or to make excuses for your behavior. Examples: The alcoholic, arrested for impaired driving, may tell himself, and everybody else, that the Police are out to get him. A person may fail to get a job he has applied for, and then tells people it was really a crummy job anyway and he didn't really want it.

Fantasy
When the world of everyday life becomes too painful or difficult to bear, some people turn to the inner world of fantasy. Day dreaming and wishful thinking replace action. Combined with avoidance you get retreats into fiction via books and/or TV.

Alcoholics often combine rationalizing and fantasy. The result is: "IF ONLY... Syndrome"

Examples: If only I had money... If only I didn't have a wife and children... If only I could do what I want... If only people understood me... If only I were younger (older)...

Intellectualization
In order to avoid experiencing his real feelings a person may discuss his problem(s) in an analytical, rational, intellectual way. This is common among college educated people and alcoholism counselors who have fallen off the wagon. This defense often frightens or repels other people leading to isolation and a strong sense of loneliness.

Procrastination
Procrastination is another way to avoid painful feelings by convincing yourself that a problem can be dealt with later. Examples: "I'll look for work tomorrow." "I'll stop drinking tomorrow." "I'll get the car fixed after I get a job."

Reaction-formation
This defense is simply faking your feelings or expressing the opposite of what you really feel. This process can become so automatic that you actually do not know what your true feelings are.