Haim Ginott

Haim G. Ginott (1922-1973) was a teacher, child psychologist and psychotherapist, who worked with children and parents. He pioneered techniques for conversing with children that are still taught today. His book, Between Parent and Child,. stayed on the best seller list for over a year and is still popular today.

Communications Approach
The following serve to illustrate Dr. Ginott's communications approach:


 * Never deny or ignore a child's feelings.
 * Only behavior is treated as unacceptable, not the child.
 * Depersonalize negative interactions by mentioning only the problem. "I see a messy room"
 * Attach Rules to things, e.g., "Little sisters are not for hitting."
 * Dependence breeds hostility. Let children do for themself what they can.
 * Children need to learn to choose but within the safety of limits. "Would you like to wear this blue shirt or this red one?"
 * Limit criticism to a specific event - don't say 'never', 'always', e.g. "You never listen learn," "You always manage to spill things", etc.

Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish were members of a parenting group run by Dr. Ginott and state in the introduction to their book that Dr. Ginott's classes were the inspiration for the books they wrote.

Quotes from Between Parent and Teenager

 * "Rebellion follows rejection."


 * "Truth for its own sake can be a deadly weapon in family relations. Truth without compassion can destroy love. Some parents try too hard to prove exactly how, where and why they have been right. This approach will bring bitterness and disappointment. When attitudes are hostile, facts are unconvincing." p. 38